A dedication to the women in our lives.

I am sure most of us celebrated mother’s day two Sundays ago. While it is an annual ceremony, for some people it is just one of those days of celebration akin to Valentine’s Day or worker’s day. However, for some of us, it is an occasion that reminds us of that special someone who has left a big impression in our life. 

Often what comes to mind when we hear “Mother’s day” is biological motherhood, which of course is the literal definition, but I believe it should be beyond that. Biological mothers are important, carrying pregnancy for nine months and nurturing the baby until adulthood is no small feat, however, there are people who are not our biological mothers yet they stand behind us in our weakest moments. They provide shoulders to cry on when our world is crumbling. They celebrate with us with genuine intentions when we achieve milestones in our lives. They check on us to see how we were doing, and they do not hold their tongue when there is need to tell us plain truths that exposes our vulnerability. I am talking about these real Mothers. 

I have such women in my life, women who stood by me through difficult times and happy moments. I am not ashamed to admit that women played a significant role in my life’s success story. They nudged and guided me every step of the way; honestly, I would never had made any head way in life without their unflinching support. 

For instance, graduating fresh from school and struggling to find my feet as a young art director in advertising, I found support from my first boss, Julia Oku. Her counsel saw me through many difficult challenges as a young executive. Everyone who has worked with Julia knows and feels that deep nurturing warmth that exudes from her personality, and because she truly cares, everyone who has been with her cannot help but fall in lock step with her motherly strides. 

Like I said earlier, restraining the definition of mother’s day only to biological mothers has limitation. Biologically a child cannot be older than his or her mother, however, an adult can be Mothered by a younger person. I found this to be true with my voice coach, Mallory Chipman. I met Mallory at a time I just wanted to prove to myself that I was not as terrible a singer as I have been told. On several occasions, I was told to forget singing because “they said I have a bad voice”. This was the case until I met Mallory. When she listened to me she said “who told you, you can’t sing” I said many people, in fact the previous week, I was rejected at the church choir audition. Well, the rest is now history as I have released 4 singles and my full album is coming in December this year, thanks to Mallory Chipman, a vocal power house and musician extraordinaire ( https://www.mallorychipmanmusic.com ). 

Growing up as a kid, my senior Sister adopted me just for the fun of it; she has always been there through many hard times. Sometimes we fight, and when she is upset with me, it hurts like hell. I learnt my first lesson on love from her, that “Those who love you most, hurt you most” It’s not that they intentionally hurt you, but for the fact that you know they love you, you hold them in high expectation and little disappointments from them hurt very much. 

Finally my biological mother. She was a giver, a selfless non-restraining giver. Until her last moment, she put her children’s need first. Though she died 23 years ago, I cannot help but wonder why she was so selfless. Are all biological mothers like that? 

I must say women have been influential in my life; they were genuine friends, mothers, lovers, and pillars of support. While I cannot mention all the names of women who have affected my life for lack of space and time, this is to let you all know that your labour of love has not gone unnoticed. 

To every woman on the face of the earth who is caring and loving someone, know that we appreciate you and I stand on behalf of the rest of the world to say we recognise your labour of love. Moreover, while it is okay to scream “Happy mother’s day! “at the top of our lungs, what we really mean to say is “WOMEN, WE LOVE YOU !! ”.

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